a little accident before Bio papers

Still a bit of fearful now, maybe when that was happening i was not so startle about it, but now........ i can't even sleep properly . I think i really got shock , maybe because this was my 1st time to happen accident.

I'm not the driver, say 1st, lol. It was happened in the greenland road before pass by Chong Hua high school . My friend, Xiang Jing was the driver, actually this was my second time to sit his car, I don't know what the car's called :p , paise, because i'm always not good in all this. This was a 四连橦 accident, we was the second car, but this was also our fault. He was too late to stoped and hit the Kancil in front of us. Then the car behind us hit us, the car behind again hit the car brhind of us . Swt. He was startled totally at 1st,actually me too.

Luckily we both were good citizen who followed law to tied seat belt , kaka. So we were safe . Actually noone was hurted in that accident too. All of the people in the four cars including baby were safe, THANK GOD BLESS US . i can see that my friend was so nervous, and he felt scared too, because that car was his mom's car. We drived the car to a side, and a man who own a repair car center was there. My friend and i was though that they were doubtful bcause when we just hit the car, within a second, the man came for us and helped. Too fast for him and his kakitangan to be there la.

Among the four cars, one was boss, looked bussy, he left for worked just after few minute the accident . Another two car were fitted in with family, one was Indian's family, they are going to pinic..... i guess. The Kancil was Malay car, the man , i think the father of the family looked the unhappy when the accident happened, i mean, of course nobody will happy on that situation, but looks like we spoilt they family plan , so sorry. I feel like he wanted to scold us, but just maybe he saw we were still so young, hehe.

Those adults were discussed at a side, i feel like they were wondering how to settle my friend and i , lol. Honestly , at that situation who don't scared, exspecially this was our 1st time. XD But my friend was thousand time of worried and fear than i'm, so i've to be staunch and console him.

Finally, his dad was came and settled all for us, he went to report to the police and masquerade that he was the driver, bacause as he said, my friend ( his son ) was still "P" if happen any accident, maybe lessen will gantung.

After that , i called Billy came and fetch us to library, as at 1st we are going to library , n_n

Behind of his car

In front of his car, just a little spoilt

SPM~~~~ What the fool it's

OMG , SPM had just past 3 papers, honestly i don't feel it is hard , however i know i can do better, but i din't. So sorry to myself and don't know how start now again, what the hell i am worring now ! Sweat ! My english, it's really a fool , i had try my best during the exam, but not during the preparation , i know i can do even better than what i had did, i know i could, but what had happened was i do not pay enough effort and concentrate on my SPM . It's really kidding me..............

Recently, nothing much to happen. Everything is so normal, everyday life past like photostat, the same the same and the same.............STUDY. However, what's the difference is the place that i study at. Swt,........... i really don't know what to say.By this time, i should go to cook rice for dinner, but i allow myself to be lazy now. >.0
Honestly, i had nothing to write about. If say the lattest new of me , i think is that i had graduated gua. Oh ya, i have remember, my notebook had taken away for reformate, and what make me angry is the guys din't copy up my backup for me and somemore change my Windows Vista to XP,this really run me crazy .And the night, i cant sleep and feel very sad and angry, luckily Sam accompany me, Thx~
Haiz... don't know what to write ........... The incident that happened on dear is really miserable, dear , don't be numbness to your life, i hope you can away of all those early .

好吧！你得逞了，我又生气了！

在我世界里，你无敌了，因为你是唯一一个能让我生气的人。我觉得我们分手时我忘了向你拿回一样属于我的东西............我的情绪掌控盘。还在你那儿，因此我的情绪仍被你操控着。你随便称赞我一下，我就会开心整个星期。而你对我的敷衍能让我马上没有心情做任何事，即使明天考试了，也完全读不进。

你真的跟我画得那么干净了吗？我觉得是，至少你不会再为我的愚蠢而生气，为我的天真而担心。一切现在对你来说都不重要，无所谓了。分手后的你还有早睡吗？周末前一晚应该很少会在家吧，周末晚都在打game吧。分手后，你潇洒地说你在享受少年时光，做些让老后不会后悔的事。或许那样的快乐以让你把之前对我的关心冲洗去了吧！

你很快乐，理当我应该替你高兴，但当我需要你，找你时，换来的只是你对我的无奈，敷衍和懒得理的态度。我真的拿么不值得你去关心，去安慰吗？我知道这都是我的错，是我的错。那么你可以把我的情绪掌控盘还我吗？

最近，我遇到了不顺心，难过的事。难过得需要人陪时，我甚至很迷惑要找谁好。我应该可以直接call你的，但你对我的态度让我害怕了，怕得不敢找你。我知道，又是我的错。

你不知道几时才会来看我的blog。很多时候我很想写blog但都懒惰。只有你，只有你能给我一伤心就写blog的冲动。分手后，我不生气了，很难生气了，但一遇到你，只要和你顶嘴超过三句，我的心自然就不舒服，关电话后我的心就更难受，接着很生气，然后就什么都做不了，只能取出笔和纸拼命的用文字发泄。

分手了，但我的情绪掌控盘还在你那儿，而你的影子还留在我这儿。我的情绪才不会在被你操控呢？而你的影子又何时才会在我心里消失呢？找一天我们出来把它还给对方好吗？

说给你听

怎么啦，我们怎么了？你说早知道不要向我告白，那至少我们现在还可以当朋友。其实你知道吗，我很担心你的病。你还怪我吗，把它告诉其他人。对不起。真的对不起，我是真的有苦衷的。那时，我很压力，真的很压力，一边知道你的病，一边想着是否接受你了真的可以帮到你的病。又怕自己的性格会在伤到人，又放不下另一个他。那时，我真的很压力很压力很辛苦，学校又忙着不知道什么。那时的我，快崩溃了。可是，我必须坚强，因为病人需要我啊。但是，人还是人，我是真的很需要别人给我建议，我才会跟朋友说的。谁知道如我所知，她真的不相信，她说是你骗我接受你的。

我真的很需要听听别人给我的建议，给我支持，给我勇气去面对。因为你病了，我很担心你，真的很担心，后来不什么跟你聊了。不是我逃避你，不理你，而是我很难受当我看到你时，尤其是你头痛时打给我，听到你的呻吟，我真的很有罪恶感，真的很自责。为了你的病，我除了祈祷还有一直在你身后看着你，担心着你就真的什么都做不了。真的有想过要为了你的病和你在一起，但是当我问你时，你说不要这样的开始，后来你要时换我接受不了了。

你叫我不要再找你，不要在理你，让你放下，真的很抱歉我们的感情会变成这样。你说你的病的一控制了，但是我还是怕，怕你是不要我担心才对我这样说的，怕你不对我坦白，隐瞒你的病。每一次，当我很自责，很内疚时，我真的很希望很希望很希望你是骗我的，很希望有一天你跟我说是骗我的，是为了和我在一起还是什么都好，总之是骗我的，我想那一刻我应该会很开心。真的很希望你是骗我的，因为我真的很担心很担心你。

你说因为告白失败我们才会这样，真的么？小六时你又不回这样想？我们都是不是注定要闹着，冷战着毕业呢？我们还能有几个一起毕业，以前是我闹冷战，现在是你的时候了，我们到底几时才长大呢？我们又还会再一起毕业么？

Why am i blogging....NOW??!

明明在读书却又不知道为什么跑来开电脑写blog . 好闷啊~每天就是读书读书和读书。到底还有多久？还要这样倒几时？好闷的生活啊！前阵子，facebook又disable，好像是被haked了。真糟。好酒每有美美的拍上一张了。最近又考试，也没有美美的脸拍照了，T.T。到底要写些什么好呢？

就说最近的心情吧。最近的我好不甘寂寞哟。一只不愿一个人呆在家，尤其是在家读书，好难受哦。一只想找人聊，向找人陪，一直sms给那个人。不过他好像没有什么心要陪我，所以也少找他了。那个B， 不知道最近怎么了，好久没有联络了，不知道他的病怎么了。自从他没追我后，也没有在跟我提起了，还是很担心。每次看到他是就很难过，不知道难过什么，只是觉得很对不起他，不给他机会。又为我们的缘分和友情感到难过，也为他的病感到难受。谁可以告诉我，我怎么了？

想回之前那一段日子，就觉得自己很贱，很要不得，很不会想。伤害了这么多人，却还在对人蠢蠢欲动，真的很不要脸。很多东西是去了就很难在拥有回了。再拥有，那份情也不会像从前那样熟悉了。

我现在有两个愿望，一，是考试可以顺顺利利。二，是希望B的病能好，和希望我和他现在的情形可以在绕回初中时那样开始。

朋友，如果有什么可以让愿望实现的方法，请告诉我，我真的很希望第二个愿望可以实现。因为至少那是我无法控制的。但我还是会加油。

要回去书本里了，星期一还有Bio paper 。最后， 我希望身边的朋友都健康，开心，幸福平安的成长。朋友，你看到了吗？要幸福哟~~

你们知道吗？悄悄告诉你们哦，其实............我好爱你们唷，我的朋友。

我爱你.............们

恋爱的滋味，好久好久都没试过了
不是因为不爱了，而是这种爱，太孤单，太自私了
所谓恋爱，也只是两个人，互相无私忘我的把爱传达给对方。想的，做的，为的，都只是对方。
一个人所给，所赐予的爱，是伟大的，是很有力量的。
我身处在充满爱的土地上，所呼进的都是甜甜的空气，被赐的是无边无界的爱。
因此，我决定要谈上一场世纪恋爱，对的不是一个人，而是千千万万的人，想的，不是单数而是无数，为的，不只是他而是他们。
我要恋爱，要和全世界谈恋爱

你，听到了吗？
人所给的爱，是一种超越所有研究，所有科技的强大力量。
不要再犹豫什么了，你内心深处的爱，赐给多少人了？又有多少人真正得到了。
让他们的到吧，把你的爱赐给所有缺乏爱的人，你会发现，原来地球是“心”型的。

我爱你，你爱我吗？
别在把这句话只对一个人说，应改改了
我爱你们，你们感受到了吗？
爱，本来就因该是无私的。

Cool Day

Today was a meaningful and sufficient day for me. Ok , let me explain wat had i did today, which fill me happy and joy . 1st, I wake up at 8.30a.m. morning , after bath , Kai Yang and Suh Wei came and picked me up at 9.00a.m . After few days din't see horssy(Shu Wei) , when I met her this mornning, chatting none stop until we reached F.T (佛堂).
After reached there we started to prepare breakfast, we were the earlier to reach there, and 慧芬姐姐 la of couse, hehe. Hui Fen called me to boiled water and pare potatoes before cut into chunks . Horssy was did the...... I also don't know what's that call, just beated the mixture of eggs and flour .
While we were preparing , teacher Jing Yuan, Book Bok and Jian Qiang were reached too. Teacher Jing Yuan said that he was surprise to see me and Horssy there, haha. When we were preparing, he kept asked us can handle or not in joking way. We smile and chat while doing, but we are 100% serious, kaka. After that, Hui Fen asked us to fried the (eggs + flour ) in slide, Wao , this really trouble us . Although we broke almost every piece of the thin egg+flour slide, but trust me, it's taste delicous , because i kept tried the failed product, haiz...poor me.
When we done, Wilson and Ke Perng also reached, Oh ya before that Jing Lun was there also. We had our breakfast together, bu tsome of them had ate before come. I loved the curry which prepared by Hui Fen , it was so delicious. The breakfast that we ate was plentiful and delicious.
After breakfast, we drink tea and talk about ethic and things relate to morality. I've learnt something new today again . Uncle Ming Guang had question us what is the different about Tao and religion . Well, i really don't know, so he also explained to us . We had discusseed this and drink tea for about 1 hour ++.
After this, me, Horssy, Wilson and Ke Perng went to studied in study room, and those form 6 also went to studied too. We studied in living room anyway, teacher Jing Yuan there with them too, serously they were so noisy. During the time, Jian Hui also came after passed his motor "P" test . I did my tuition homework there, and Horssy them studied Chenistry . We studied until lunch time. Then having luch there too.
After lunch , we continue our studied, but this time, Kai Yang was helping us , Yeah~~ He is really a "live dictionary" . Although he had left form5 about 1 year ++, but almost every subject and MM , A.M formula he still can remember. OMG !! He had teached us Alkene, electrolysis, and Salts chapter . Wao , really a lot.
We studied untill 5 something. Wilson really learns a lot today, and i said that maybe we thursday will come again. Hahaha. We want to date Kai Yang to teach us again, haha. We end our studied at 5.15p.m . Before going back, we cleaned F.T together . Ke Perng and Horssy swept the floor, Wilson and i were mopped floor. We done it in 15 minute and Kai Yang fetch us back .
How can i describe it, just a wonderful day. I cooked, learned, studied and helped among a day. Afer F.T i went to tuition straight away. Wao, today was wonderful , i love't .I hope everyday can passed like today, meaningful and full. Hahaha....^.^

Let's see dish which i and Horssy prepared this morning, >>
Me and Horssy showing our pieces>> :)
extra:I really looks so short meh?? :(

Our breakfast in F.T today( 6 stars service ), kaka :~D

British Coucil

B.C , what a familiar name of learning english centre for everyone. I have been learning english there since form 3 1st term. I 've made many friends and teacher there. There is a tuition which actually make me relax and happy. I learn new things there and also know many information and general knowledge from B.C. The people there are friendly, like the staf officer, canteen aunty,guard uncle and teachers. They always smile at you when communicate. I've made a number of frienda there, but some of them are not learning in B.C anymore nowadays.
When i just came B.C ,the 1st teacher who had teached me for my Lower-intermediate was Louise, she is a lovely and hardworking teacher . She always hope to buy a small apartment in England,she said althought it's expensive but lovely. Anyway , before the end of that year she was sended to another B.C in England for teaching. After she left, everyone of us missed her so much.
Another teacher, Emma replace her and continue our studied. Emma was a funny, nice and easygoing teacher. When she teach us she was in pregnancy. Emma had showed us her baby's photo which still in uterus,i've forget wheter it's a baby girl or boy, but if i'm not mistaken is a baby girl.
When Emma went to give birth of her baby, a man teacher who name Derek replace her. Derek is a chinese who born in England. I can't remember exactly where he came from,but he is a tall , single eyelid,cool but friendly,and always have his own style on teaching students.His son also learning in B.C , i saw his son before look a little like him, :) After few weeks get along with Derek,Emma was back.She still looks healthy after give birth.I still remember the last day of the term, she gave us to watched movie-Liar.
The next year ,when i was form 4 , i was going to intermediate. The lesson for intermediate was no longer on sunday morning. One of the class was on Saturday afternoon 3 something to 5 and the other one was on Sunday afternoon 2.45-4.45 . That was the time which one of my best friend in British Coucil, Zoe cannot continue with me and one of my another best friend, Bee Zheng. She choose to go the saturday lesson, and as i know she is no longer learning in B.C now. She came from butterworth and older than me one year . She is a beautiful and funny girl. Althought i still have her number now, but din't contact with her from this year.
In my intermediate year, my teacher was Stuard (spelling not sure ), who came from England too. He always told us his hometown, but i cantrecall the name of the city anymore. Anyway, he is a serious ,friendly and teaching in formal teacher. Althought sometime i feel that his lessson is not that interesting but seriously learnt a lot from him . During the intermediate class i also met new friends, but i'm not good in remember their name ( T.T Sorry ).
Haha, this year i am in Upper-intermediate. Seriously the things that we learn this year really fit our standard, i mean Form 5 standard . This year my teacher is Susan, a lovely, kind sweet and responsible teacher . She never teach us in the formal and boring manner, most of her lesson, we learn through games , computer and communicate. Honestly, i find that Susan like to let us speak in class, and she seldom use course book too. Well this is the opposite of Stuard, Stuard used to teached us by using coure book .
Susan was married, and her husband was also a B.C teacher. Her husband was teacher of my brother class, but now my brother din't go anymore. I think Susan is the only teacher that i speak the more to her. She's sweet and always give her support and encourage students who are not capable to speak well or present.
I also met new friends this year, haha. This term, we have 5 new students , wao. One of them who come from english school S...gus... (don't know how to spell ), her english is the better among us. Since she came, she became the outstanding and teacher like to listen to her comment too. Haiz.... Anyway, she is a nice person too, and the most important thing is she is younger than me one year.

There are some photo which capture with friends and teacher in British Coucil:
Buddies in British Coucil ,Bei Xian(beside me), and my old friend Bee
Zheng. yeah~~ ( another one ,San San shame to capture, swt )

(Indian+chinese)+(mix-blood+indian) child, Harswini. Another one of my friend in B.C , pretty,warm and knowledgeable girl. Younger than me one year, from Butterworth .

This is my old friend in B.C , Bee Zheng, from Union high school. I know her since i came B.C in 2007 year for my 1st term. We both science class and sitting for SPM this year.




















Teacher Susan who has teaching me now, lovely teacher.
Capture after lesson , :p

I will never forget teacher in British Coucil who teached me before, and friends who i met in B.C . I'm not going anymore next term,but I love B.C forever, i love you all , Thank You teacher, thany you my friends , Thank You British Coucil !!

“乖gu”离家出走

哇啊啊啊~~ T.T~~T.T~~ 好伤心啊~~~~~

我的“乖gu(乌龟in hokian)”不见了！哇啊啊~~ 好难过啊，我的gu...... 你在哪里？妈妈好担心你啊！快回家，“斯文败类”（另一只乌龟的名）好想你啊！你不在了，它都自己把食物抢光光了，它都那么肥了，你不在，它吃得更多了。快回家吧！公公（我爸），刚刚跟你们换水了，他很少会这样做哦。我还为你贴了寻龟启示了呢。

Haiz.... 我的乌龟失踪了一只，好伤心哟。我中二开始就养了的叻，有感情了嘛。本来它们是养在小龟盆里并安置在我房里的，每个星期换一次水。后来，它们越来越大了，所以便养在更大的盆里。现在拿盆对它们来说开始小了，而且因为在大盆，所以我把它们安置在阳台。以前有他们关盖的，但后来我想，乌龟应改要晒太阳吧，所以便大开盖子，并斜靠放在盆旁。

不知道几时开始，那比较小的乌龟开始会爬出盆外了，尤其是下雨天或大太阳时，它就会爬出来了，其实是两只都会爬出来的，记得以前有一次我要去喂食它们时两只都不在盆里。不知道爬到那里去了。

我从来都不去找它们，因为它们会自己爬回盆去，真是有时候很为它们感到骄傲一下。后来那“斯文败类”因为大得快，龟壳变重了，所以很难爬出去了，只有“乖gu”还可以爬出去。有一次“乖gu"还爬到对面aunt的家门外。haiz.....来回忆和乖gu的一些点滴吧.

这小东西就是我所不见的宝贝“乖gu"

“乖gu"爬来房间时拍的。来，姐姐疼，muakszz ^@^

看镜头，cheese~~

我“乖gu"的寻龟启示........

被诅咒的爱情路

我应该怎么开始呢？懒惰啰里啰唆地开头，就直接进入主题吧。每个人都说一样的话，说甚么恨自己啦，自己无用啦，不想活啦，什么什么的。我不想和他们一样，每一天我都过得很开心，尤其开学了，开始忙了，很多东西都可以不用去翻不用去想。

为什么我的爱情路不能像Gossip Girl 里的主角们一样，那么干脆，那么潇洒呢？为什么都说不了，还那么执着？明明拒绝了却还说给一次机会。再拒绝一次，说我自私说我狠心。说不可能了却还说应改试试。为什么，为什么，为什么，为什么！为什么分后不能再当朋友，为什么没有开始也不能当朋友，为什么喜欢上了要当朋友很难，为什么为什么，为什么！为什么！啊~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

我不要，我不想，也不敢再被爱了。一旦在被爱就意味着我再会失去一个朋友，我不要！我要的是朋友。一旦过了朋友的那条线，很多缺点就会暴露，这就是为什么你偷偷喜欢他/她时的感觉怎样都比在一起后的好。难道大家都不懂吗？

我讨厌这样，讨厌现在的他，他说我变自私了变得不像以前认识的我了。那时当然的啊，我们都踩过了当朋友的那条线。为什么人那么想不开？向自己喜欢的人告白固然是好事，但要告白就要有被拒绝的心理准备啊。如果失败了，当然还可以继续喜欢，继续追求，只是方法应该检点一点，低调一点了。因为被拒绝后还热情十足地继续，有时候未必是好事，更糟的是有时候还会被讨厌。那不时更没有机会了吗？

我的爱情被诅咒了，我担心的不是没有男朋友，而是没有朋友，我要的是朋友，不是男朋友！

Missing day

今天，我做了什么？我不知道耶。人是跟朋友出去了啦，但魂却不知留在哪里。明天还要去学校，我的魂都还没有回来。
为什么会出去呢？我也不知道，是那个coin决定的，我真的不知道为什么我会去。当我先到那里时，我遇到kk那一党，很自然地，我闪的很快，自然得自己都不知道为什么。后来舒薇叫我到电影那里meet ，我乘escalator一上到，直望便见到他们了，不知 道为什么，我竟然躲起来，后来趁他们不注意时溜掉。我到电器店前坐了下来，感觉很害怕见到大家。我本来想不如自己一个人走走了就回了。但有想到是那天要我来的，而且既然来了不可能就这样回吧，过后......忘记怎样过了。

directionless

What's life mean? Don't know why, recently always think of this question, how dump am i . Holiday should be happy what. A lot of things happened this holiday,about friend , own relationship ,family , school activities and tuition . Tuition also got problems, what the , haizzz.
I try to recall the happier day during this holiday , i think is today and the day went to ah dear house . Wao, both of these days are thursday too. Ah dear said that she started blogging is for improving her language skills . But for me, i started blogging is for relaxing and to give vent from my annoyed life .
The day before yesterday , my uncle had an accident at Butterworth . His motorbike had rammed two motorbikes, two Malay. My mom said he was lucky that noone had seriously injured and of course he too. He's now at GMC Hospital, his foot was injured,and his nose was abrasion too. Tuesday night, when we received the new that he accidented was at 11.57p.m. We rushed to the hospital at Butterworth and transfer him to Penang hospital. At the hospital there, we saw the sufferer's families and friends . The sufferers was actully serious than my uncle, i feel so sorry to them. Well, on the way to Penang hospital, both my mom and aunt scolded my uncle,haiz, those adult....
What should i say next, about my relationship, there's nothing to talk about . Just........ i want to be single . But one of the guy i don't know how to tell him , he was sick and may leave anytime, this what he say . But i won't let ant of my friend left me, she too, LR. Ah dear i am so lost now, what isthe best decesion i should do , what's it

咸咖啡

太阳好不客气地照耀着大地，路上的行人都这强烈的阳光照着，不得不迷着眼或戴上太阳眼镜。窗口的另一边，一杯冰块正快速溶解着的咖啡坐落在桌上。水滴，滴滴答答的落入咖啡内，她，正在发呆，想着他们之间的最后一句话.........“我们已后都不要再见面或联系了！我没有眼看你。”嘟.......嘟......　在她大脑还来不及给任何更好的回应时，电话里只传来了这声音。

她没有怪他，只因为太了解自己。他为她改了很多很多，许过的承诺就如数星星般，数不完，但他都做到了。然而，重视自由，任性的她，却连唯一答应过的事都违背了。他很失望，受伤了，不果仍坚持再给她机会，一次，两次，三次，到了第四次她还是让他失望。他伤痕累累了，她好不伤心，自责，当他要再一次要相信她时，她提出了分手。他呆着了，之前的忍受，伤害都算什么？

最后一次的通话，她只是静静地听他的难过，而心里万分的自责。她明白自责不是他要的回报，所以无言以待。他说着说着，声音开始有些抽泣，含糊不清，最后把之前的痛苦，失望，借助眼泪发泄出来。而她，早已泪流满面了。电话的两端占满了他们为那最纯最真的爱流的泪。真是难为那电话筒了，因为至今年以来平均每次他们聊天时它都会被淋湿，不过今后它就只能怀念了。

女孩提起已被天气暖化的咖啡轻轻喝了一口。“咦，怎么带点咸味了？”